More Laid Back…

Maybe it’s because I’m older. Maybe it’s because I’m tired. Maybe it’s because I’ve “been there, done that.” Maybe it’s even because I’ve finally gained perspective. Whatever the reason, I’ll take it, thanks!

I’m more laid-back about parenting than I used to be. I was talking with a friend this past week. (Yes, she’s younger than me, and, yes, this is her first child…) She is consumed with worry about her eldest child who is not getting desired grades in elementary school. Mom is stressing out. Child is apparently stressing out.

I tried hard to listen with compassion. I tried to gently suggest that grades are not “make or break” at this age (especially when we are talking Bs and A minuses…) I affirmed that grades are not a true judgment of being a good (or bad) parent. What I REALLY wanted to do was shout, “GET A GRIP! Worry about something REAL, for goodness sakes!”

And then I remind myself that I used to worry much more about my parenting with my first kids. I wondered what others were thinking about how I was doing. I worried that others were judging ME based on what my kids were doing (or not doing). I admit it, I was competitive, comparing how my kids were doing versus other parents’ kids. I was worried about what “GRADE” I was earning as a parent. At times I drove myself crazy…and I suspect I drove my kids crazy as well.

Ahhh…it is WONDERFUL to have gained perspective, if that is indeed what made the change. Whatever the reason, it is so freeing to be a more laid-back parent. If this is part of getting older (and, dare I say it, growing up), I’ll take it!

I suspect my youngest two children are happier and less stressed than their older siblings were. I KNOW I’m happier and less stressed. It doesn’t seem to work to challenge my younger friends to reach for this phase…so I’ll just keep my mouth shut and enjoy it for myself…

Let’s hear it for relaxed, laid-back parenting…

I think this new attitude deserves a big fat A. What do you think?


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